Top 5 Reasons Rohloff Makes The Perfect Hubby

Top 5 Reasons Rohloff Makes The Perfect Hubby
My Rohloff, my German internal gear hub system, love of my life, I take thee for better or for worst, in sickness and in health until death do we part,  my friend, my companion and love of my life. I lawfully wed thee in front of the cycling community… You may now kiss your hubby Rohloff.

cartoon speed hub
Isn’t he cute? I always have loved red hair
Top 5 Reasons Rohloff Makes The Perfect Hubby
 
Number 5. No Skid Marks On The Derailleur You never have to clean skid marks off the derailleur.  Actually Rohloff is a S and M freak, after all he is German (bad joke). He prefers to wear metal underwear especially if it is a thon. He will however settle for wearing a thorn instead at most occasions.  His internal gear system is encased in a strong metal casing so gumming up the derailleur is never an issue.
 
Number 4.  Low MaintenanceI have been in this exclusive relationship for 2 and ½ years.  A long time for a relationship that began online. It doesn’t take much to keep my mail order hubby happy. The secret? Cook him up a little “oil de la oily” for dinner every 5000-10000km and you are good to go.  (the rohloff hub requires an oil change every 5,000km)
 
Number 3. Always A Great Ride. Smooth, gentle moves every night of the week,  Oh la la, need I say more.  16 countries and 30,000 km later. Rohloff has still got it. (lifetime guarantee)
 
images
 
Number 2. Watch Bicycle Porn  Rohloff’s idea of a great time on a Saturday night is watching a thrasher movie featuring a derailleur that has lost its gear on the western side of the middle of nowhere. Out in the Gobi desert, Karakorum Mountains or the jungles of Borneo, my hubby Rohloff has stood loyal and faithful throughout all of the above.
 
Number 1.  Your Sugar Mama Will Be Jealous.  Ok, so Rohloff comes with a high price and you might need to get another sugar mama to buy one of these, however, over time the cost will make up for itself with an unending, committed happiness. And like an expensive wedding ring, you will look at it, feel it’s beauty and smile knowing that this one actually does come with a lifetime warranty.
 

For more gear news see Girly Girl Gear For Guys Too

One thought on “Top 5 Reasons Rohloff Makes The Perfect Hubby”

Comments are closed.