Zebras for Zero Dollars…Budget Tips For African Safari Travel

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Safari-“an expedition to observe animals in their natural habitat”

Grandiose visions of wildlife, migrating wilder beast, roaring lions and galloping giraffe filled my gleeful mind when I first envisioned traveling through East Africa. A budget of about 10usd a day aught to cut it, I reasoned when I turned my wheels south into the continent from Cairo, Egypt. After all cycling is a low cost form of traveling and a great way to have a budget adventure. However, tourism is well established in Eastern Africa. high end holidays options abound. I do fully encourage African nations to make the most out of what they have to sell. However, some of us are still on a tight budget.

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Victoria Falls as seen for free from the walking bridge between Zambia and Zimbabwe

For instance entrance fees and transport to the pyramids round out at about 50-75usd, which I saw for free when I cycled out of Cairo and that herd of wilder beast will cost you 200usd plus a day to catch a binocular sized glimpse of them from afar roaming over the Serengeti plains of Kenya and Tanzania. But like most travelers, I came to experience Africa and for me that means looking at wacky wonderful species I had only seen in captivity.

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Pyramids of Egypt, free from the roads and parking lot

So how do you see Africa on a tight budget. After 3 plus years of cycling the world, it is safe to say I travel on limited means. I cut accommodation costs by sleeping for free at religious missions, police compounds, schools and outback of small shops on route meeting new friends and sharing my photos and stories along the way.

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free camping at a school on route

I venture in to the occasional tourists campground for 8-15usd a night in areas too heavily populated to sleep safely out in the bush somewhere. Although, free bush camping is great fun with the rainbow colored lizards, slugs the size of my hand and the fancy funny insects, spiders and snakes. So how can you spot those lions, tigers and budget bears, oh my ? (Other then clicking your heals together that is). Here are some things I have learned this past year to keep the low cost fun going.

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Elephants who really do not care about park boundaries, (60km from Kasane, Botswana 5km from the Namibian Border

Bring A Tentmany campgrounds, backpackers and lodges have camping spots that will cost you half the price of a room. It is also less hot outside in the breeze than indoors most of the time.

Game Reserves are a fraction of the cost of national parks and often will allow cycling/walking. Reserves of Malawi, Kenya and Zambia are great examples of this. They are home to giraffe, zebra and hippos.

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Have elephants forgotten where the park boundary is?
Cycle or walk around outside the national parks that have known animals populations. The elephants of Botswana are often seen for free outside park boundaries saving the cost of entrance fees. Warthogs haven’t got a clue about boundaries either. Lions are rarely spotted during the day but also roam about at night outside the lines and probably best left out in the dark.

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Ask other travelers where they have spotted animals for free.

-The odds are pretty good that the giraffe they saw last week eating on the side of the road has develop a taste for that specific area.

-Northern Namibia Zebras, Giraffe.Malawi, crocodiles love the lake and are often spotted in Nhkata Bay.

-Uganda Lake Victoria area, hippos live by the dozens in the south east corner and easily spotted for free from the dirt tracks at a distance.

Sudan,watch camels galore make their way north through the Sahara to Egypt.

Special note: There are some hazards. I pushed Pandemic The Magic Bicycle through the woods this past week while stalking a zebra. A thorny stick poked my leg through my pants…fast forward 3 days. I have a tropical ulcer on my leg which is healing well and doesn’t feel too bad to cycle on. So, be careful out there because even zebras for zero dollars have their costs.

Matrimonial Mayhem. Is Africa Safe For Solo Women?

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Us Africans have a problem….” The man dribbles down his stripped shirt and straightens the belt on his bulging kacki pants. His muscular hand firmly clenches his Mosi brand beer as his reddened eye balls gaze with affection at my sunburned peeling bare arms. Oh, this aught to be good I chuckle to myself and raise my eyes up past the cracked wooden stool and glare up at this flirtatious harmless buffoon. The only place in town with a fridge and cold soft drinks HAS to be a bar, I giggle and glance through the tattered azure floral print cloth. It is hanging over the shaded doorway. Pandemic The Magic Bicycle is waiting patiently in clear view outside under a orange tree in the midday humidity.

Us Africans have a problem, we like your skin, I want to marry you.” Mr. Pants-A-Tingling (P.A.T) lovingly slurs again as the older protective gentleman behind the dusty gray wooden bar shifts his feet and curiously peers on. His reserved elderly pink lips seem ready to pounce on his drunken buddy if need be.

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I am sorry Sir, but I am not sure I want to do that” I politely smirk with as much soft sincerity as I can muster as the elderly gentleman barkeep laughs in support.

Will you marry me….?” Mr P.A.T. continues on deeper into matrimonial hot pursuit, somersaulting over cumbersome formalities such as knowing my name.

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Casper, my husband wouldn’t like that much” I grin as my pinocchio nose begins to grow and tall tales of Casper (the ghost), my fictitious husband begin to rise.

Your children then, I will marry your children!” Mr. P.A.T stumbles forward and perseveres deeper into never never land. I am now chugging my cold coke-cola trying not to laugh, chock or spray soda out my nose.

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I will tell my unborn children all about you Mr. P.A.T., nice to have met you.” I sarcastically utter as I head for the door and hop on Pandemic for a quick get away. Minutes later while cycling, as the heavy stench of testosterone ricochets off my panniers, I realized how brilliant WOW (Women On Wheels) co-contributor Helen  Lloyd truly is. She counted the many marriage proposals while she cycle toured throughout western Africa. I’m definitely gonn’a need a calculator, I reason to myself as I carry on crossing from East into West Africa.

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Hemorrhoids and Heatstroke…Top 5 Outstanding Reasons to Cycle In the African Rainy Season

Number 5

You can cycle for days with a t-shirt shoved into your pants while hoping your now big bottom will create padding between your 3 headed hemorrhoid and your hard leather bicycle seat.

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Number 4
Push the pedals up 30km hills with your blackening toenails while sweating like a hooker on a Saturday night in rain so heavy you are convinced that zebras must know how to swim.
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Number 3

Enjoy camping inside a police compound as the flirtatious, intoxicated night guard named Lovemore insists on asking you where you are from again and again to only forget you have already had that conversation with him just minutes ago at 2:37am.

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Number 2
After getting busted, find yourself in a debate about bush camping under a tree “technically” inside a wildlife preserve after sleeping there only because the posted price at the “official” campground seems to have inflated by 5 fold because you have showed up. Then have the once open gate locked in your face after trying to apologize and pay while holding back a long feisty sentence concerning the minimal differences between you and the many villagers who are also sleeping under trees in the immediate vicinity.
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Because it is all part of a day in the saddle of a solo female cycling around the world on a Cairo to Capetown adventure.
Check out the 2013 WOW(Womenonwheels) Wall many updates!!!
 
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Robbed In Tanzania

That brown  door does  not look right, I think to myself as I stand facing my guest house room door, the lock has been broken, I have only been gone for about twenty minutes, I think to myself as I gently push the door open at the Baranga Guest House in Kibondo, Tanzania. Everything I own has been scattered onto the bed. The dirty white top sheet is covered with the contents of my three panniers and sprinkled with the red dirt from the arid rough road.
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 I lean down over the mess to take a quick inventory of my belongings. As expected, Prozac (my laptop) is missing, my camera gone, bicycle pump, sleeping map, sleeping sheet are gone, etc. “This is not looking good”, I say out loud to myself as I realize that madness has permeated my reddening tear ducts, the brown door with rusty hinges is still open. The housekeeper walks by and smirks.  I close the door with Willy (my enormous knife) in my hand, mad, crying, a little bit scared and hoping that the robbers will not be coming back. I sit on the dirty bed amidst the cluttered remains of my belongings and try to sort out what has happened.
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2 hours later, two police officers arrive. The utterly unhelpful senior officer is drunk, and laughing.   The round chubby housekeeper with the red bandana remembers seeing two men but doesn’t know who they are. Yeah right, I think to myself.  The boy in charge of the reservations swears he was not there. Good one, I think to myself as I tuck my lips into each other, trying not scream BULL SHIT. I say goodbye and close the door, the hinges creak as I shut the door.  I maneuver Pandemic the Magic Bicycle’ pedal between the wall, the bed and the door in order to latch the door securely shut. The lock is broken.
I sit on the dirty littered bed in the mess, still crying and justifying, rationalizing and convincing myself that I knew I would eventually get robbed and I always just hoped the robbers would not hurt me.  I am not hurt, this is going to be ok, is this not some strange right of traveler’s passage… as robberies go, this is not so bad…  I think to myself not yet, but almost laughing. And, in that moment sitting on the bed at the “scene of the robbery”, I realized that I am not crying about Proscak (my laptop), camera, photos, video and writing lost, camping gear or other material possessions but at the irony of having only gone to the Baranga guest house in Kibondo in the first place to get some sleep.

Madame Mzungu

“Mzungu, Mzungu,”
 I hear joy hollered from the road side as I cycle past raising my tired arm from the grips of the dusty handle bars struggling to form another droopy hand wave. It is possibly the 137th wave of the morning as the word “mzungu” imprints into my psyche. Uganda is the most welcoming joyful country I have pedaled in some time …although technically speaking these insanely happy people are calling me names, I chuckle to myself. I then pull over to the side of the road to say hello to the elated road side crowd and to take photos of more uniquely bizarre creatures. A pair of 3 foot birds with protruding double chins are stumbling around the lime green terraced hillside amidst long horned cattle. The birds are acting like drunken sailors avoiding bovine obstacles in search of a drink. 
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“Hello my name is Madame Mzungu”, 
I say as I stretch out my freshly freckled arm to greet the brothers who are standing to the front of the group.  Their rounded faces, sparkling front teeth and crab apple cheeks are uncontrollably grinning. Their dark shiny eyes dance as their bellies humorously jiggle. The morning light shines through the younger brother’s iridescent curly black hair. His brown Barrack Obama t-shirt is proudly tucked over his belly into his jeans. His torso shakes uncontrollably as he laughs at my introduction. 
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My new name, Madame Mzungu is a joke of sorts to keep me sane and energetic amidst so much well meaning roadside attention. Choosing to self entertain and give up on cycling too many KM’s after the 138th kind, welcoming, sweet person of the morning insists on hollering for me to stop to say hello from the road side. I try to remember something I read about Uganda as I stop once again to chat with new friends.  In the 1980’s under the bludgeoning rule of Amid, Uganda was put on the map for mass killings and giving all Asians 30 days to evacuate the country.  The Ugandan spirit has weathered well although due to it’s past, the country still sees far fewer visitors then neighboring Kenya and Tanzania. Therefore, everyone is happy to just have a visitor to chat with.
 “No Madame…”
The man wearing the Barack Obama shirt says laughing so hard he can hardly catch his breath to continue…
 “You see, during the time of colonization, Ugandans had a hard time pronouncing the European peoples given names and invented the word ‘mzungu’, it means white person. The word has been past down from our ancestors and people laugh when they say it because it is a funny word to get out of the mouth” 
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“Oh…right on, Madame Mzungu is happy to hear that, although I am more pink then white due to my equatorial sunburn”, I say peering at my sun baked hands as the contagious sound of the young man’s bellowing chuckle uncorks my laughter. I feel in that instant how unusually funny I must appear in his eyes, standing over a bicycle with neon pink skin, taking photos of a herd of long horned cattle, his dinner. After a chat about Barack Obama, a hugely popular man in Africa, how to care for healthy cattle, how much we all like matoke, Uganda’s traditional cuisine of boiled plantains with peanut sauce, I say my goodbyes and pedal on heading over the dusty but lush terraced hillside towards the Rwandan border.

Friendly+Uganda=Too Much Fun!!!

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Somewhere in far western Kenya in the village whose name I did not catch I was adopted, taken in by a hard working nurse named Margaret at the local mission clinic. Clients with malaria, dysentery, typhoid, some 9 months pregnant line the cement porch of the makeshift hospital, a series of concrete and wooden buildings with sporadic electricity.  Patiently, the villagers wait for their turn with Margaret.
 
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Margaret, her plump spirited smiley face and shiny short curly hair tends to everyone who comes to her for care.  24 hours a day Margaret works caring for the communities health concerns.  Margaret sees me on my bicycle near the entrance gate and she openly invites me to camp on the clinic grounds inside an extra delivery room, a wonderful shelter from the rain soaked humidity that echoes from the rain soaked hills near the Kenyan/Ugandan border.
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As the full moon sparkles through the cracks of the wooden window, I set up my tent listening to Margaret preparing the room next to me.  She is bringing large blue plastic jugs of water, numerous candles and mopping the floor with a grassy stick.  She beams with anticipation going from my room to the next as she tells me she is expecting to deliver a baby because the full moon is good for new babies. I fall fast asleep.
 
In the morning, I open the door of the delivery room where I camped and peer into the open cracked wooden partition of the room next to me. I smile and say good morning to Margaret and a group of glowing new mothers, grandmothers, sisters and cousins taking turns holding their newest community member. Margaret tells me that the new baby girl is very tiny but strong with a good heart, Margaret had delivered the baby by candle light.  I mention how well I slept and that I didn’t hear a thing. Margaret tells me that Pokot tribal women did not make noise when they deliver and they do not use drugs.
 
I thanked Margaret for the too short of visit and offer her a thank you gift of hydration salts, paracetomol and ibuprofen for malaria fever that I had in my bags. I say goodbye and cycle towards the Uganda border.
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After the border formalities, I pedal to Jinja delighted by the Uganda welcome.  The Uganda spirit equally as kind of the Kenyans with an extra splash of sunshine, the children wave and holler hello and the adults flag me down to say hello.  Musical beats of African drumming and rhythmic hip hop pound out of every available shop.  You have got to love a group of folks that always seem to feel like dancing, I think to myself as I cycle and smile at folks hanging out by the shop doors dancing while sitting, bopping while selling fruit, and singing while driving by me on their motorcycles.
 
If Africa kindness and good times stay this pleasant it might take me quite some time to pedal through Uganda into Rwanda for there are an awful lot of wonderful people to meet along the way.
 

A Cup Of Humanity

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As I push forth through the final hill on the outskirts of Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, the firewood carriers have captured my attention.  Women, bundles of firewood strapped to their mule shaped backs. peer down into the shadows of the mountainside. Their tiny strong thighs stride forward up the road to greet another day.  Fueled by nothing but biscuits due to a rotten food encounter, Pandemic The Magic Bicycle continues to cycle upward through the mountains into the surprisingly modern city’s edge.

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However, I cannot focus on my own pedal pushing endeavors.  The fire wood carriers, as refered to by int’l human rights group, are baring the steep gradient barefoot.  Is there not an alternative. Could the needed firewood used for cooking fuel not be obtained more humanely? Where are their husbands to help share the weight? I think  to myself.  Multi-generation mule type activities imposed on the family’s females has heightened my emotions many times before while pedaling through Asia, the Middle East and now Africa.  
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Angered by women’s slave like circumstances in many places in the world, I climb. Overwhelmed by their stout determined roadside stride, I climb. Confused by accepted genre roles in many cultures, I climb. Amongst frowning females and the occasional grin of a ignorant to an easier life youngster, I climb. With the modern capital city of Addis Ababa in plain view I descend, an age old traditional Ethiopian coffee in the city a waits.
 
“I want to open an orphanage to teach boys how to be men”, I am enjoying famous Ethiopian coffee in the heart of the city with an Ozzie man with a dream.  “What do you mean?”, I ask, although after seeing women carrying loads of wood and other goods on their mule shaped backs for weeks, I am fairly certain I know where this Ozzie with a dream is heading.
 
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“Women bear the brunt of the heavy lifting and daily work, men here are lazy”. I sit happy to have found an evolved mind, and smiling to have not ranted my angered rowdy feminist thoughts first. Struggling to accept with any amount of support what I continue to see, like a firecracker to it’s first flame, my westernized mouth explodes.  “I don’t understand why people don’t realize that a job like carrying huge quantities of wood every single day would be accomplished far easier if everybody helps, although, what these tiny women can carry is truly remarkable.” The Ozzie man with a dream simply grins and says, “Yes, I want to open an orphanage so I can teach boys how to be men and teach them how to treat women with admiration and respect”.  With my grateful enlightened grin fueled by a cup of humanity and manly wisdom, I pedal up another of the world’s hills in the remarkably modern capital of Addis, Ethiopia


(Shortly after writing this I picked up the local English language newspaper, The Reporter. Inside was an article about the firewood carriers.  Turns out while collecting the days firewood there is also a  rape problem.  If they have the money they can bribe the guards in the forest not to rape them. Most can’t afford the bribe.)

7 Surprising Destinations For A Great Bicycle Tour

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Is it safe? Is that a good location for a bicycle tour? Personal safety tops the charts in everyone’s minds when it comes to travelling abroad especially for a bicycle tour.  Europe, France in particular comes to a lot of people’s minds in terms of tourist in fracture and a long standing history of bicycle travel. In fact, having never cycled before, I began my world bicycle tour in Europe. I started in England, and pedaled the coast of Wales and then took the ferry to Ireland.  The sustran network has some wonderful maps of local cycle paths through Europe for slow going recreational bicycle touring. However, many of the larger open roads remain not bicycle friendly and more cycling accidents do occur in Europe than say Ethiopia, my current location. 

Ethiopia is a challenge not due to traffic but a largely hilly terrain and the occasional shenanigan of a rock throwing child. 
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However, what you will find in Ethiopia and much of the developing world is slow gentle traffic and near empty roads. Laos and the entire world renowned bicycle touring loop in SE Asia  delights cyclists by the dozens from the around the globe.  Year round cyclists flock to revel in the delicious inexpensive cuisine, short distances between accommodation and friendly locals. Often, there is not another vehicle in sight except another bicycle tourist enjoying another delicious snack.
 
India might just be the most dangerous place I have cycled; I do believe I was the only one trying to stay alive while on the road, after all, beliefs in reincarnation do have their limits. However, the Manali to Leh highway is an oxygen gasping testament to altitude cycling and a must pedal for many mountain enthusiasts. 


New Zealand may have a “we rarely lock our doors policy” but also hosts non existence roads shoulders and quadruple length logging trucks. After announcing that he wants to be the all time most cycle friendly governor, NZ’s top dog is now busy lengthening the cycle tour network of routes throughout New Zealand. With a little planning reducing cautionary yellow hazards can be easily avoided and the far southern hemisphere scenery is stunning.
 
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Mention my favorite destination of Pakistan’s Karakorum Highway for cycle touring and many people conjure up images of pedaling amidst terrorists and bombs. However, while I pedaled through Pakistan and also Iran and Sudan, deeply ingrained in the Muslim religion is a welcoming of visitors with open arms. A warmer welcome and safer more beautiful road, I have never felt among the general public then in the Muslim world, particularly on the KKH of Pakistan.
 
Sudan is another destination that makes for a wonderful bicycle tour. An unusual destination but Sudan boasts empty paved roads, a non-existent crime rate, wonderful freedom camping, nice people and water and food every 50km. The South Sudan conflict now peaceful, so readily spoken of in the media is truly a world away from North Sudan and an amazing camel laden cycling route that crosses the famed Sahara desert.
 
Is it safe to travel there? Is that a good location for a bicycle tour? Questions, I usually dodge because the best place for a bicycle tour is the one unique to you, it is the one that leads out your front door.
 
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Up and Down With A Baboon Frown… Enjoying Those Big Climbs While Cycling

Swooosh, the steepest descent since leaving the Dali Llama’s Himalaya hill top months ago  is beneath my smoking wheels. Literally, my back wheel rim is practically smoking, too hot to touch. The break seizes and the rubber brake pad wears thin.  

My front break, disabled for some time due to a never ending friction problem, flaps open incapable of assisting to slow my speed. A rock bounces off the ground, as I swerve into the morning wake me up air. The children here in Ethiopia continue to play their rock throwing game.
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I am not sure who threw this rock that bounces through my vision, launched by either a child or an adult throwing a rock at a child for throwing a rock at me.  My best advice for all the locals big and small is everyone really needs to put down the rocks. I skid to a halt and the children scatter.  Ethiopia’s shenanigans are notorious. 
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The front brake now clamped and engaged. The extra friction of my broken front break could only help in slowing me down to ride the sharp switch backs down to the Nile Gorge Bridge. Like tea pouring from a kettle, I continue to spill forward, halted again by a sizzle of the front wheel. A puncture, unique due to heat, has blown the valve to a hissing bubbling release. Cold water splashes to a sizzle on the front and back rims. Puncture repaired, front brake disabled once again, the bottom of the canyon is in sight, a 1000 meter drop in 22km.

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From the canyon floor looking up at the mamma of all climbs, 1000metres back up in 22km, now thoroughly awake; I realize I am getting the stink eye, a pleasant change from dodging a rock.  Baboons perch, sitting on the canyon walls and just stare. The locals give them bread, I have come empty handed, hence the stink eye.
 

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Four climbing hours later, the canyon ridge top in sight, I am serenaded by a fossil lemonade stand. Industrious kind children are selling fossils they have collected by the river. 
 
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I thoroughly support their effort of not begging but simply offering to sell their treasures after school on their way home. I take out my rock pouch and they name my other Ethiopian minerals that I have been collecting for some time.  Accumulating rocks, fossils and minerals, weighing down my panniers is probably not the best hobby but sometimes while climbing up and down with a baboon frown the earth’s treasures are too good to leave behind.
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Stick To What Rocks…Why You Should Bicycle Tour in Ethiopia

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What the….? The infamous Ethiopia is in sight.  The border is a medley of mayhem, merchants, touts, money changers and self appointed guides.  The wonderful thing about a magic bicycle is, it also serves as a getaway vehicle. A remarkable easy way to politely turn down the hassles that surround the business minded beggars and the crowds of folks ready to pounce on an obvious tourist dollar.  The “official immigration” procedure is fast and quite pleasant; the officer laughs at my tactics, as I skid to a halt at the door of the immigration building, completely ignoring the overly helpful shouting crowd of self appointed uneccessary guides. 
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 I receive my entry stamp and off I go through the gates of the legendary Ethiopia.   A country that is so renowned for its challenges that many including myself attempt to avoid it all together by traveling through Uganda and Rwanda. Tackling Ethiopia’s stone and stick wielding children, roads with hill gradients build by sadistic lunatics and an extremely high petty theft rate, never seems to rate too high on the must cycle list. This route was my second choice when the Sudan, Uganda and Rwanda option was not available due to politics and ferry boat cancellations.  However, actual violent crime in Ethiopia is rare and almost unheard off against tourists, proudly brimming with a far safer crime rate than many North American cities.
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3 days later….sticks are flying and stones bounce off the insanely hilly ground.  Children hold the bicycle back rack and attempt to take anything that they can lodge free.  Everything flying my way, I pick up and take with me. I now have a stick on the front handle bars and a dung ball strapped to the back rack.  I do not blame the children or the general mistrust on the part of the public.  In many ways, Ethiopia has been destroyed by foreign aid swopping in with very short well funded non-sustainable projects.  I have been asked for my shirt, my shoes, my braided hair, pens, medical supplies and many people are begging for food and water.  A people rich with wounded pride now accustomed to foreigners giving out non-sustainable solutions, teaching a misguided failed altruistic message of “we know best, you can’t take care of yourself, you need our help”.
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A brief band-aid solution leaving many angry without community based sustainable solutions to problems that persist for far longer than the provided funding period of a couple of grants. However, deep within these challenges of cycling in a country so hilly that at times even defeats my super low Rohloff gearing system, leaving me pushing up hills, lies a beauty. Hidden deep below the surface, an intense sort of near manners soaks through in the kind folks that also dot the hillside villages.
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Many children and young adults just peer at me with their devilish smiles, as I stop the magic bicycle and offer to shake hand after rock and stick wielding hand along the road side.  I simply figure, if they are going to throw things anyway, I might as well stop and try offering some attention instead.  Shaking the hand of a might be beggar or stone throwing child is pretty effective thus far. I do believe being female also could help me stick to what rocks, as I continue to ponder the beauty of bicycle touring in Ethiopia.